典型五段论
这是老师教的模版吧
虽然差个结尾

模版还是掌握得挺好的

剩下的问题比较大
从语法到词汇到论述都不太行
孩子是不是比较小
太小了不适合写这个

建议强化语法和词汇
如果需要比较高的英语水平的话
多读原版书多背课文
如果走高考路线 倒不用急着下太大功夫

【 在 icome 的大作中提到: 】
: What thing would you like to do that you have never done before? For me, it would be to be having the top grade in class. I would like it because it can make me more popular, make my parents happy and make me more hard working. This is why I would like to have a grade that is the top of the class.
: Making my parents happy is good for me. My parents always hopes the best from me, so if I don’t get a good grade, they often would “kill” me. I can benefit from my parents if I got a good grade. They said I can buy something I want If I got a good grade.
: Having a top grade can make me a lot hard working too. It can make me more and more self-confident on learning. I would know that I have the patensial to be good at learning, and can make me more want to improve my grades.
: ...................
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修改:tokilltime FROM 111.193.97.*
FROM 111.193.97.*